The following conversation is a perfect example of one of the many hilarious reasons why Lauren and I have been friends for twenty-one years. We can change the subject fifty times, and talk about absolutely nothing of importance and absolutely everything of importance for hours and years on end. The following is simply an excerpt from a particularly amusing conversation. It all started when Lauren asked me how Spring Break was going. Enjoy.
Me: Are you in Houston all week?
Lauren: Yes ma'am. At a rockets game currently.
Me: ...what sport is that?
Lauren: Basketball lol. We just met up with the spring break campaign that's there.
Me: Is watching basketball fun?
Lauren: Ha it's better in person, but we also walked around a bit.
Me: Haha well that's nice. I took down my Christmas tree. That's all.
Lauren: Haha well at least you finally accomplished that.
Me: Kinda. I can't find a big enough box for the bottom so it's just laying in the floor.
Lauren: Haha well you'll eventually get it all picked up!
Me: Too bad I don't have an attic...maybe I should get a house and a dog and then I could put my tree in the attic. Great plan.
Lauren: Yes good plan, but add a husband in too. Even better plan.
Me: That's true. Very good plan. I'm afraid he's off with the house and the dog somewhere without me. Silly husband-to-be.
Lauren: Well you will just have to go track him down and get him back on the plan!
Me: Haha it would help if I at least had a first name to go by.
Lauren: You should go to different church meetings throughout the week and find him!
Me: But how will I know it's him? I guess I'll just take a survey of who has a house and a dog.
Lauren: Very good plan. And if you're up-front and honest about it, you can weed out the ones that will be freaked out by the concept.
Me: Haha true! And I can hand out my number to the ones who have a house and a dog.
Lauren: Does it have to be a certain kind of dog, too?
Me: A big dog!
Lauren: Yes, so also make a column for kind of dog. Or you could just be a greeter and slip your number into cute guys' pockets.
Me: Great idea!! I should probably use Microsoft Publisher since columns are a pain in Microsoft Word.
Lauren: I wouldn't know. lol
Me: Haha, I should probably make a column for job, too...as in, do they have one. However, in today's economy, that might decrease my number of options drastically, so maybe I shouldn't make a column for that.
Lauren: Y'all could just live off the salary of love.
Me: Of course. I'll get rid of the job column. I can't think of any other important columns.
Lauren: No, I think we have determined all of the important ones.
Me: Agreed.
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